Today is Day 21.
Today would be chemo day before I was mercifully healed.
For the next several hours, I’d watch the clear bag of poison drink into me, praying it was killing only the bad stuff.
But that’s over, hallelujah.
I still circle Day 21 on my calendar, because it’s sacred to me.
My husband always turned chemo day into a fun date. Love does that, unwilling to surrender a single moment.
Chemotherapy is mean.
It’s like finding out your town has been invaded by a gang, and hiring the Italian mob to get rid of them—you can be sure there will be a shady price to pay.
Hair and eye lashes are returning, I have endless energy, and can pretty well blend in at the grocery store.
But my fingernails are falling off and I feel like a diesel truck ran over my bones—
A small price to pay to get to live.
But I still catch myself staring…
Something I noticed as my face fell off and steroids swelled me right out of my clothes was how stunning all my friends are.
Many days I wasn’t expecting visitors, didn’t have the energy to wear make-up.
I was ball-cap bald when my friends would breeze in for a visit.
And though I would try, I couldn’t help staring at them.
The human face is plenty proof God is splendidly, madly artistic.
You don’t believe me?
Go to a mirror, right now.
Look at your eye brows…
Have you ever tried to draw on an eye brow that wasn’t there?
I assure you, it cannot be done with a pencil. There are shafts and shapes and impossibly perfect angles.
The variation of thickness and color—all of it, a miracle you should stop taking for granted.
And your eye lashes?
Can you see they grow right out of your skin? You have no need to camouflage a fake seam with make-up, no need to trim the excess.
They’re perfect, just like you.
You’re perfect.
My friend, look at your hair.
I’m wearing a crochet boggin right now, imagining your hair.
Look how real. You have no need to wonder if it’s on straight.
Wigs are funny blessings. Too high on the forehead and you look like a killer clown. Too low and you’re Joe Dirt.
Thank God for wigs, but still.
Look at you.
You are such a masterpiece.
Look at your fingernails…
They’re healthy and firm and useful. You can paint them or treat them to an acrylic manicure. They’re perfect.
Can you see how stunning you are?
Tonight after I’ve tucked my family in bed, the wig, the eye brows/lashes, the make-up, will all come off.
If my daughters are restless in the night, I’ll slip into their rooms to whisper prayers and pull their covers up, avoiding the shafts of light so maybe in their dreams they’ll think of my hands as belonging to the mommy who once had a face.
A face like yours.
I am grateful. God knows I am.
I’m trying to help you be grateful, because you are the most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen.
Forgive me if I stare.
I praise You, God, because I have been so amazingly and miraculously made. Your works are miraculous, and my soul knows it right well.
~ Psalm 139:14
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Sally, you are a beautiful soul! So grateful to know you! Love you, dear!
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Thank you so much for sharing the true, real you! Me and Connie Beth have been praying for you every single day since I learned what was going on. Your strong faith and character, I’m sure, is such an inspiration to many. Please continue to keep us posted of the good work and healing God is doing in your life, as we continue to lift you up to Him. God bless you and your family!
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I have always thought you were so beautiful, Sally. Honestly, one of the prettiest girls from that whole area! But, following you and seeing how committed you are and just so good, I can tell you that you are one of the most beautiful people on the inside as well. I can’t help but be in awe of you and your faith and absolutely love reading everything you write.
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Speechless~ definitely blessed. As always prayers and love coming your way. ?❤️?❤️?
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You are beautiful without a face, hair make-up, eyebrows, eyelashes or fingernails because dear one, God created you as His child. He sees so much more than our pitiful human can see. So you are a beautiful being and I could never think of you any other way
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So very grateful to have eyelashes and eyebrows —
Really am. But I’m so thankful to have a sweet friend
who is beautiful from the inside out…… all the way through each layer. These bodies are only going to last us for a few years but our spirits are going to live forever somewhere. So thankful you keep us all encouraged and looking up! Love you.
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Grateful, Thank you for reminding me to be thankful, You are beautiful. I Love to read your writings .❤❤
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So beautiful. Thank you for a gentle nudge reminding me of all the beauty there is in this world.
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Kennedi asked about you out of the clear blue sky yesterday. She wanted to know if I knew her friend Etta Rose’s mom. I replied that “yes, we met at your birthday party.” I stopped for a moment and thought about all the woes I had encountered and remembered that God is still on the throne and he can bring us through anything. Thank you for sharing your thoughts and reminding us about what really matters.
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So touching and beautifully expressed. Much love to you for sharing your heart.
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When the nurse was explaining all the horrible side effects that I was about to experience with my first “treatment,” She stopped in the middle and said, “why are you grinning so?” I just smiled more and replied, “doesn’t the Bible say, “if I drink any deadly thing It won’t harm me.” We both laughed when she said, “Yeah, it sho do!” And sho enough they didn’t and God healed me too from malignant Melanomia ten years ago.
Blessings and thanks for the testimonies Mark 16:18
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Yes ma’am.
You are beautiful too. And all that will be back in no time. ?
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Thanks for reminding me to be thankful!
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Grateful, Thank you❤️
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Tearfully grateful, my beautiful friend. Love you!!