The saying goes, If nothing changes, nothing changes.

But experience has taught me that even if everything changes, if we don’t change with it, we’re no better off.

I thought when my husband got a better job, I would be better at saving money since we were used to living on less income.

I thought if I could finally become pregnant, I’d always be a happy, grateful mother.

I thought if my parents retired I’d get to see them more.

…if my health were restored, I’d never drink another Mountain Dew.

…if our homeless friend had a nice place to live, all his problems would disappear.

…if we bought a trampoline, our girls would play outside more.

…if my hair grew back, I’d never feel ugly again.

…if my husband bought me a treadmill, I’d exercise.

Not one of those assumptions was correct.

So many times I’ve believed, wrongly, if a certain prayer were answered or circumstance changed, the situation would be better.

But what if some of the situations that appear to be broken are really just a reflection of how we feel about ourselves?

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How much tension in your life would go away if you could look in the mirror and say to yourself, I’m not going to spend one more ounce of my energy hating you?

Did you know many diseases are rooted in self-hatred?

If you want to be less anxious and have healthier relationships, stop hating yourself.

If you were able to love yourself, would you be so quick to find fault in everyone around you?

If you chose to stop hating yourself, would you still be unable to sleep because of the failures that manifest when you close your eyes?

If you didn’t hate yourself, would you be brave enough to try something new?

If you forgave yourself, would you be able to forgive that other person?

Call it whatever you want—perfectionism, self criticism—it’s all the same.

Self-hatred’s little brother is procrastination.

If you loved yourself enough not to fear failure, would you procrastinate as much?

It requires humbleness to love yourself, so if pride turned loose of you, would you still spend so much time seeking someone else’s approval?

Sometimes it’s more than just a choice; it takes a good amount of praying through and believing with all your heart that God loves you at all times.

His voice is not the mean one.

Maybe there is a lot that needs to change to improve your situation, but if you were to sit with this a minute and be honest, learning to love yourself might be the best gift you’ve ever given to the people you love most.

Ask God to show you how.

It was His idea.

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Love the Lord your God with every passion of your heart, with all the energy of your being, and with your whole mind… and love your neighbor the same way you love yourself.

~ Jesus Christ

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